Believe it or not in K and I's short relationship of 3.5 years we haven't fought. Sure we have bickered, but we have never had a full on fight where we couldn't be in the same place or figure it out after a couple minutes. I know that eventually something will happen and we will hurt each other no matter how badly we don't want too. Everyone says marriage isn't easy. I believe it, I really do. But I haven't had a reason to yet.
Well, except today. I have realized that it's just not Kyle and I whom will cause bumps in our marriage, it's the forces around us as well. Every single person is different. There are things my husband likes, dislikes, thing I do that piss him off, he washes and loads the dishes in a different way than I. I am easily annoyed and the littlest things piss me off where he can sit through a movie with his neighboring viewer smacking popcorn. In my case I would have freaked the heck out internally and had to move or leave the theater.
Every family is different. Diversity is a marvelous thing in the world. However it is so hard to learn how to cope with the differences. We can't be mediators trying to make things work all the time, eventually our voices need to be heard. Thing is how do you learn to deal with diversity? As of late choosing silence seems to be the best answer, but you can only stay silent for so long. How do you let yourself be heard without causing tension that doesn't need to be tightened anymore than it already is?
Thing is I don't know, and Kyle doesn't know. The great thing about marriage is you grow together and figure out to navigate life. We don't know what we are doing or how to do what we want to do. But we do it together. We are learning that we can't control somethings and no matter how angry they make us we have to be together on it. As a couple we have to stay a team and stay on each others side.